Walk freely in his love

Real love vs counterfeit.

A great exploration into the depth of God’s love, his amazing love for his children. His love that heals, restores, delivers, strengthens, frees……

being saved by grace.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about The Fathers love for us and felt really compelled to write a little bit about it, of course I’m still learning about it, still trying to accept it and believe it’s for me so I am definitely no expert! 🙂

We are all born with the capacity and the desire to love and to be loved, the words ‘I love you’ evoke such a huge joy in us and I believe that only when we experience Gods love and let it fill our hearts we will be truly happy and the more we obey God the more we feel this amazing love.

My favourite bible story has always been the story of the Prodigal Son (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=luke%2015:11-32&version=CEB) but only lately has it really hit me how much it displays Gods love for us, even after the son had made a real mess of things…

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Nothing broken which can’t be fixed!


At the moment the latest fad in my house is my new kitchen inspiration board! I’m very chuffed with my £1 buy. Over the past month different people have taken the time to write something positive or inspirational on the board, and since I spend a lot of time in the kitchen its given me plenty to ponder and reflect upon. My latest little board phrase has generated the most discussion so far, “nothing broken which can’t be fixed”….. I actually wrote this one recently myself, to keep myself going. Since may most of you are aware I’ve been in hospital twice also during this time I’ve lost my boyfriend and my job ( just don’t know where I’ve put them, if found Please return!) Jokes aside its been a tough couple of months!! In all of this though was that strong, quiet voice from inside that said “keep going  Louise, your be fine. We can handle this. I have a plan for you.” It’s times like this that God shows his faithfulness and sticks right with ya through all the mess. In fact he gets right down in it with you, rolls his sleeves up and says “keep calm and know I’m God!”

So yes I’m a firm believer that there is nothing broken beyond repair. No matter how bad it may look, how damaged, how many pieces are smashed over the floor, how bad the situation may look or feel, how broken you feel. All can be fixed. I’m not saying it’s always easy. Fixing something can be time consuming and hard work, for example imagine you smash a glass vase. The glass shatters and spreads itself all over the floor sitting, waiting for its fate to be decided. Now yeah you could just sweep it and throw it in the bin. Move on, buy a new one. But what if that was special to you, meant something, had sentimental value? Wouldn’t you painstakingly pick up each piece bit by bit and just like a jigsaw work each piece back together. It wouldn’t look the same as before, the cracks would show, the glue filled gaps telling of the damage. But it would be fixed. Fixed with a story to tell. And the time spent putting each piece back together would be time well spent. A victory you could claim!

I believe this is what God does with us, with our situations, our messes, hurts, mistakes. Nothing broken which can’t be fixed. We can be broken right. I became a Christian 5 years ago now and came to God absolutely shattered. A broken mess. I believe just like that glass vase, he put me back together. Do I look the same? No. But boy do I have a story to tell. Recently when I found myself in a mess again and everything around seemed to be breaking down i held on tight to Gods promises to me. I knew that he would work with me in my situation no matter how messy. Never once would i have to go at it alone. And I knew that he would work it all out together for my good. That after the storm would be calm and I would bathe in the sun. And I knew that there was no damage beyond his repair. No person beyond fixing. No situation beyond his control. And no mistake beyond his love and grace. So although many people have argued with me and my board has caused a debate or two recently, that not everything can be fixed, I still beg to differ. 2 months on and I feel great! Situations and breakages will come and have come but I believe I have been fixed even stronger and with another story to tell, another tale of victory. I read recently that when the Japanese break something, they fill in the cracks with gold. They believe that something broken and damaged that has survived becomes more beautiful, as it now has character and a story! If your feeling broken today, know that God can fix you. You can do it. You can overcome your past, your present, your circumstance, your hurt, whatever you may be facing. If you’ve been fixed, come through the storms of life and are currently chilling in the sun, then send up a little thanks, pat yourself on the back (your an overcomer) and be prepared to share your story.

Nothing broken which can’t be fixed!


yes that’s me, randomly laughing at the most inappropriate time!!

I’m lucky most of my friends have come to know and accept it as just part of me. MOST have got past being offended. Most have come to learn how to handle the situation. Some even now join in! Although spontaneously laughing seems a funny idea and many a time I’ve been told it’s a gift, when your friends crying because her boyfriends been ‘kidnapped’ or a lady tells you a hoover fell on her friends head and randomly and totally inappropriately your brain decides to turn these into cartoon images ,or remind you of some of the funniest moments of your life causing a sudden outbreak of unplanned hysterics it most definitely doesn’t feel like a gift. I dread having to break bad news, hate talking about tragedies and hate HATE awkward silences, in fact awkwardness of any kind. It’s in these moments that my brain goes to war with me and is determined to make me look as mad as possible! And this is the back drop for Wednesday night….. me, 3 nuns, 1 priest and psalm 62. Beautiful psalm, beautiful chapel with beautiful people singing to a beautiful God. But little old me felt awkward. I was vulnerable, my brain took advantage. The line, “this leaning wall, this tottering fence” just proved too much and in this quiet little chapel and in this beautiful moment laughter spilled out from within. Embarrassment took over and Louise quickly removed herself from the room laughing to oneself down the corridor. Laughing at what I do not know? I very rarely know what causes it these days… I do know though that it often makes me look mad and usually once I start its like pringles, I just can’t stop!

Still the gift is, it is contagious! Usually infecting those around, and in the midst of all the doom and gloom, I guess that’s a good thing, right? Although I have been offered counselling sessions to probe for suppressed emotions, maybe I’m in denial about my state of insanity…. que cartoon picture of me looking mad though, spontaneous laughing coming up! I can amuse myself any time, any place, any situation. I might look mad. Maybe I am mad. But I’m laughing and a wise man I know once said  “laughing is better than crying my friend!” Apparently it’s a calorie burner too!!


What’s beneath the surface…..

I have a hidden layer,
There’s more to me, than what you see,
A hidden treasure buried deep,
An inner core knitted, woven,
formed into me.
A deeper layer that goes way beyond flesh and bones,
A deeper layer than what you know.
than what you see.

I have a hidden layer,
An inner strength that makes me stand,
a comforter, a best friend,
a faithful helping hand,
that rises me from the ashes,
pulls me up out of my pit,
and in the middle of a storm,
by still waters makes me sit.
Although I can’t be sure of what next the world will throw at me,
I am sure of one thing,
and that’s, greater is he who dwells inside of me!
He who gives me a light that’s not of my own,
and a love that chooses to make my heart its home.

I have a hidden layer,
That the world just can not brake!
That life can not crumble,
that surface wounds can not penetrate!
A hope that Wells up inside of me,
A peace that calms the wildest seas.
A word,
A whisper,
life from within.
No, not i, I won’t be giving in!
And when I fall,
I know that once again I shall rise,
for my faithful saviour is forever by my side.
No this isn’t a matter of pride.
A thank you to Jesus.
The truth, that brings life!


Thick skin!

Since 4am this morning I’ve had several attempts to get the drip back into my veins. I currently count 14 pretty little pin pricks colouring my arms and hands and still no luck! The doctor said he has never known anything like it, apparently I have delicate veins but ‘thick skin’. That’s me eh thick skinned! Knew I was made of tough stuff and now it’s official!


The God of the Itch!

This one’s for Dan!

Dan came up to visit me a few days ago in hospital and we had a laugh about some of the things Christians say when visiting the sick. Here’s just a few that made us chuckle:

“What have you been up to recently? Any sin that you need to repent of?”

“Maybe God is trying to teach you something.”

“If you had greater faith you could heal yourself.”

“There’s a lesson in this.”

And the classic……  “These things are sent to try us”

Don’t know about you but my God is love. He loves me. I’m not perfect, if I was a Catholic I would spend most of my life in confession I think, but he loves me. He is not sitting there in the sky looking down thinking of ways to punish me for the mistakes I make. The mistakes which he himself paid for i might add. “Oh that Louise she’s been at it again, what can I do this time to tell her off and teach her a lesson. I know, I’ll send a really ferocious infection to take over her body and cause every part of her skin to itch!” Nice one dad thanks, lesson learnt. I think not. My dad loves me, I’m a citizen of heaven, the world’s in a mess and while I’m here I’m not immune to the crap. Let’s keep it simple!

I would also just like to add a massive thank you to all my visitors, well wishers and prayer warriors. You have helped me to stand over these past couple of weeks and when I couldn’t i know you was standing for me! Love you all. Watch out southend ill be a free lady!! Xx xx xx